When Brotherhood Hurts: A Reflection from Singapore

Death has always disturbed me. I guess it disturbs everyone, but for some of us, it leaves a lingering ache—a silent echo that refuses to fade.

Over the past few years, I’ve been dealing with a series of health challenges. Not many know the details, but they’ve changed me. There’s something about facing your own fragility that rewires the way you think, feel, and live.

My instinct to make quick decisions—to move fast and not overthink—comes from this space. Because the truth is, I don’t know what tomorrow holds. None of us do.

And that realisation... it changes everything.

It makes you value what truly matters—health, friendship, and family.

The Unspoken Bond

Among all the roles I play in life, being a DMETian is something that defines me deeply. The brotherhood we share—it isn’t just nostalgia. It’s a living connection that stretches across oceans, time zones, and decades. It’s a nod from a fellow mariner, a warm laugh over an old memory, a shared silence when words fall short.

And it’s in that silence that I found myself yesterday.

I’m currently in Singapore for three weeks with my team, meeting fellow DMETians and maritime professionals. We’re documenting their incredible journeys—their rise, their resilience, their reinvention. The past four days have been a flood of emotions. Hundreds of conversations, filled with wisdom, humour, struggle, and pride.

But amidst this energy, a message came that shook me to my core.

The Loss of a Friend (All DMETians Are!)

It was a forwarded message—simple, raw, and heartbreaking.

“With heavy hearts, we are extremely sad to share... Vivek Sharma (2000-2004) is no longer with us. He was a superintendent in Singapore.I confirm this news with deep sorrow. He was my batchmate—2000 entry, 2004 pass out. He went for a morning walk and didn’t return for over six hours. Family and friends began searching.He was found in a park. A passerby informed the police. He was taken to a hospital and declared brought dead.A very sad day for all of us. He was a good friend—a jolly person…”

Vivek Sir was not just a name on a message. He was one of us. A friend. A fellow dreamer. A brother who walked the same corridors, wore the same whites, cracked the same jokes. And now, in the very city I’m in—he’s gone.

Why It Hurts So Deep

When a fellow DMETian falls, it’s more than news. It’s personal. We place ourselves in their shoes, think of their loved ones, and feel the weight of what they've left behind. The families, the friendships, the memories left unfinished.

It forces us to pause.

To re-evaluate.

To ask ourselves—what truly matters?

Health. Friendship. Family.

We chase a lot in life—success, promotions, wealth, recognition. But when the unexpected happens, it's not our achievements that we cling to. It’s our health, our friendships, and our families that give us strength.

Health is your foundation. Without it, everything else crumbles. It’s not just about surviving—it's about living well, being present, and staying ready for life’s curveballs.

Friendship is your cushion. It catches you when you fall, listens without judgment, and sometimes, simply stays—when you have nothing to say.

Family is your anchor. In moments of loss, in days of celebration, in the quiet in-between—they are your reason, your support, your home.

A Quiet Reminder

Vivek’s passing has left an emptiness in all of us. But within that grief is also a reminder—a call to live better, to connect deeper, to be more human.

Let’s not take our health for granted. Let’s not delay the call to an old friend. Let’s not miss the chance to say "I love you" to someone who means the world.

Because tomorrow isn’t promised.

But today… today is still ours.

To Vivek sir —your laughter, your energy, your brotherhood will live on in all of us.

Rest easy, brother.

DMETian For LIFE